We love Michele Bachmann. WE LOVE HER!!!
SHE is glorious.
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
Thursday, June 16, 2011
clash of the titans: david vitter vs. anthony weiner
Nobody wants to think about some poor hooker in 5 inch heels wiping David Vitter's ass while changing his nappy. It's totally disgusting. David Vitter is hideously unattractive, and has flabby pasty skin would be disgusting any which way but with shit smeared all over it? I'm making myself nauseous and I'm immortal and don't even have a digestive system!
Anyway as it turns out Anthony Weiner is kind of cute and an exhibitionist, and modern and All-American in his interests. He's got the hot long-suffering (pregnant!) wife, he wants to show off his junk in a new-media way, he's got good pecks, he sends his photos to young attractive women. It's juicy, it's American (we invented twitter, amirite) it's right before the 4th of July.
David Vitter, ugh. We and the media couldn't talk about it because we couldn't fathom it. There was no way to parse the scandal! To open it up, examine it, let it reach the light of day because we were very anxious to push it back into the netherworld where we would never have to think about it again.
And that my friends is the difference between who goes down in sex scandals and who doesn't. It's nothing to do with republicans or democrats, its about the attractiveness of the parties involved. There's a total correlation between how turned on we as a public are by the scandal and how much we want to talk about it.
I'm so sorry for making you think about David Vitter at all. His campaign ads never feature pictures of him for this very reason.
Anyway as it turns out Anthony Weiner is kind of cute and an exhibitionist, and modern and All-American in his interests. He's got the hot long-suffering (pregnant!) wife, he wants to show off his junk in a new-media way, he's got good pecks, he sends his photos to young attractive women. It's juicy, it's American (we invented twitter, amirite) it's right before the 4th of July.
David Vitter, ugh. We and the media couldn't talk about it because we couldn't fathom it. There was no way to parse the scandal! To open it up, examine it, let it reach the light of day because we were very anxious to push it back into the netherworld where we would never have to think about it again.
And that my friends is the difference between who goes down in sex scandals and who doesn't. It's nothing to do with republicans or democrats, its about the attractiveness of the parties involved. There's a total correlation between how turned on we as a public are by the scandal and how much we want to talk about it.
I'm so sorry for making you think about David Vitter at all. His campaign ads never feature pictures of him for this very reason.
Monday, June 13, 2011
wearepostleftist
we are vampires. we are beyond your political realm. we think that if we let the sidewalks crack the people will bond together. today they cut down a tree. nobody knows, nobody cares, nobody protested. why? because this is a leftist government and as such, the people are pacified.
we want mankind, not sheep! mankind is juicy. sheep taste like junk.
we don't think that all leftists will shoot us in the back like in a fictionalized russian town 100 years ago, but we do think that their aims are not our aims. we don't think that history controls the future, but we do think that we need to construct our own realm in which to practice the dark arts.
Love,
TV!
we want mankind, not sheep! mankind is juicy. sheep taste like junk.
we don't think that all leftists will shoot us in the back like in a fictionalized russian town 100 years ago, but we do think that their aims are not our aims. we don't think that history controls the future, but we do think that we need to construct our own realm in which to practice the dark arts.
Love,
TV!
Friday, June 10, 2011
Rome wasn't built in a day!
You know you may think that Lady Gaga invented some shit, but the truth is - Ke$ha is an actually talented crossover artist. She's played on urban radio all the time. She's played in gay clubs, and my niece loves her. Her voice is infectious, her songs play on misogyny, she's trashed all the time, and who doesn't love glitter. If you can't figure out that she's actually talented somewhere deep within, and just enjoying your life, I don't think you understand how 'art' works.
Also this Rules!:
D-I-N-O-S-A-U-R
A dinosaur
D-I-N-O-S-A-U-R
A dinosaur
An O-L-D M-A-N
You're just an old man
Hitting on me what?
You need a cat scan
Verse 1:
Oh man
Why are you starin' at me
Mack on me and my friends it's kinda a creepy
You should be prowling around the Old folks home
Come on dude!
Leave us alone
At first we thought that it was kind of ill when
We saw that you were like a billion
And still out tryin' to make a killin'
Get back to the museum
Chours:
D-I-N-O-S-A-U-R
A dinosaur
D-I-N-O-S-A-U-R
A dinosaur
An O-L-D M-A-N
You're just an old man
Hitting on me what?
You need a cat scan
Hey dinosaur,
Hey you're prehistoric!
Hey dinosaur,
That's what you are HA!
Hey carnivore,
You want my meat and I know it!
Hey dinosaur,
That's what you are HA!
Yeah, Your pretty old hahaha
Not long til' your a senior citizen
And you can strut around with that sexy tank of oxygen
Honey your toupee is fallin' to your left side
Get up and go bro!
Oh wait your fossilized HA!
Then you offered me a martini
Walk away with your hips with in sinking
Then you say, Honey wanna come with me
I'm about to barf seriously
Chorus:
D-I-N-O-S-A-U-R
A dinosaur
D-I-N-O-S-A-U-R
A dinosaur
An O-L-D M-A-N
You're just an old man
Hitting on me what?
You need a cat scan
Hey dinosaur,
Baby you're prehistoric!
Hey dinosaur,
That's what you are HA!
Hey carnivore,
You want my meat I know it!
Hey dinosaur,
That's what you are HA!
Hey dinosaur,
Baby you're prehistoric!
Hey dinosaur,
That's what you are HA!
Hey carnivore,
You want my meat I know it!
Hey dinosaur,
That's what you are HA!
Chorus:
D-I-N-O-S-A-U-R
A dinosaur
D-I-N-O-S-A-U-R
That's what you are HA!
D-I-N-O-S-A-U-R
That's what you are HA!
Also this Rules!:
Friday, June 3, 2011
It is important that we recognize the blood-sucking nature of liberal institutions like PBS
There has been a lot of talk about the problems with right-wing hackers targeting progressive causes. Then lulz international hacked the PBS website, cleverly using 'all yr base are belong to us'.
We must not wring our hands.
We must not wring our hands.
Thursday, June 2, 2011
Wednesday, June 1, 2011
marius is a bee!
obviously. I don't know why I didn't think of it first. Well, I did. He's a bee. It's clear. The description of his artwork is just a full color beehive collective poster. all over a tropical island.
Maybe 'mary' is living large in Maine, holding the secrets to the universe as told to The Vampire Lestat?
Vampires Like Bluesey Classic Rock in the Summer
They want a portable tape player to listen to Credence on.
Every spring the same thing happens. The world's aglow, riding bikes to the pond, the wind in your hair, pickup trucks with watermelon nearby... Keith Richards talks about trying to create the 'Satisfaction' sound using a tape player.
Every spring the same thing happens. The world's aglow, riding bikes to the pond, the wind in your hair, pickup trucks with watermelon nearby... Keith Richards talks about trying to create the 'Satisfaction' sound using a tape player.
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