act three: the antichrist appears to rabbit

John Boner takes ice from a little ice dish, ala madmen. He puts it in a glass in a mid century manner. He's a disheveled Don Draper. The world is collapsing and all responses seem appropriate. The bearskin rug doubles as a bed. Bring it world!

JB: She's coming here, right?
John Boner's Aid (an tall attractive nondescript thirtysomething of indeterminate sexual orientation, but quite determinate gender) takes the glass and squeezes a lime into it and then gives it back to his boss.
JBA: Yes she called earlier. She has something she wants to tell you.
RANDOM FEMALE BUZZER VOICE: Michele Blackburn is here.
JB takes a long hurried drink and hands the glass back to his aid.
JB: Quick take this. Take the whole thing. The ice, everything! Put it all in the closet. Quick. You get in there too. Take notes. Can you record? Record it but make sure I hear it first. Use your phone.
JBA: Got it.
JBA retreats into the closet, wheeling a cart with a bucket of ice and some limes with him. He closes the door from the inside.
JB looks at himself in the mirror. He likes what he sees. He takes a moment, runs his fingers through his hair and then straightens his tie. He struts over to the door.
JB: Michele! So good to see you.
Michele Blackburn (MB): John! Excellent!
Michele Blackburn, an extremely tall woman with excellent bone structure enters the room.
She grabs him, and air kisses near both cheeks, flashing a winning smile.
JB: Please sit down.
He gestures to a late 20th century chair and sits down across the desk in his own "executive" model
JB: How can I help you Michele?
The edge in his voice comes through to us, only because we are deeply connected to Our Protagonist. Nobody else would have heard it.
MB: John, I've been receiving very important communications. From our Lord, and He is telling me that He doesn't have a direct line to you!
JB: Michele that's strange. I've been praying my heart out every day here. You can see where the bearskin rug's worn down!
MB: John, I hope you aren't telling me that I'm lying, or that the Lord is lying to me. Anyway, He tells me that you haven't received the communication about the debt ceiling. John, the important thing is that we can just take the money from Planned Parenthood instead of not paying back the Chinese. Did you know that 7 of my children are Chinese?
JB: Michele, gosh...
MB: Hold on John... Incoming. .. Lord? Yes, I'm here with him.... He's saying he talks to you daily... Ahhh I see, not true... You are thinking we should go public with this? I should tell America that John Boner doesn't pray?
JB: Michele - don't you think that's a little rash?
MB: Jesus? You want me to tell everyone that John Boner is an impostor?
JB: Oh Michele, really?
MB: God? OK - ummm I see... if John goes to meet with that heathen president I tell everyone he's murdering children in satanic rituals. If he explains to the American people that the debt ceiling doesn't matter and everything can get imported from China anyway then I don't say anything?
JB: Michele
MB: OH Well thank you God for your benevolent guidance.
MB: Well John, you heard the orders! Isn't God great! Pray with me one time
Michele reaches her hands across the desk. John grabs them with great gusto
MB: Dear heavenly Jesus give John Boner the strength he needs to fight the nazi socialists by letting the American people know that the debt ceiling is just an arbitrary liberal number. Help him summon your angels and saints by letting him know that if he doesn't abide by your heavenly will we will let the American people know that he is a godless atheist smoker whom Jesus hates. In Jesus' name.
Together: Amen
JB: Thanks so much Michele for coming! I really appreciate you taking your time out of your busy schedule to visit with little old me.
MB: Oh John, just remember! Let the American people know the truth of His holy word!
JB: Thanks so much Michele, can i get you anything?
MB: Do you have any of those k-cups. I just love those things! There's no mess! It's coffee in a little cup? You don't have a machine?
JB: Do you want some tonic water?
MB: Oh John you have to get one of those k-cup machines. You would just love it! I'll have my people send one over.